Girls Unscripted

nothing good can come from this

Six words:

Okay, have you ever loved something so completely that you drive an hour out of your way just to get at it?

yes, as a matter of fact that IS a giant bucket of empty crab carcasses

Well Ortego and I have. Six words: All You Can Eat Crab Legs.

We were on our way to Eureka Springs for our friend’s wedding this weekend, when we discovered there was a local restaurant called Across the Creek Restaurant in Garfield that offered as many crab legs as I could squeeze into my gullet. We cracked shells for an hour and a half before Ortego finally gave in. I struggled on in the glorious battle and had one more plate (about three crabs worth) before declaring myself defeated.

Though this was a noble triumph, it is not by any means a record. I myself hold the honor of having spent two and a half hours cracking shells at Whippersnappers in Branson, MO. I honestly can’t decide which place had the better legs.

I had achieved in under two hours a very convincing replica of a six months pregnant belly. All you mothers will remember that horrible, tight, stretched skin over distended belly (that you get right before the stretch marks begin to appear) that makes you feel perpetually stuck in post-Thanksgiving hell. This is what I struggled to breathe around as we crossed the walking bridge back to the car, where I opened a half melted bag of M&M’s for desert.

It was worth every mouth watering, buttery, spicy, tender bite. Oh my god I want more crab just thinking about it.